is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
Randomize
