I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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