So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
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