Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
She made me pour olive oil on her.
Couch. On fire.
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