So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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