So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
