Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
Apparently on the way out of the ER i asked the nurse to doggie-bag me some more morphine.
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
Randomize
