Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
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