A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
Randomize
