i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
Randomize
