i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
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