no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
Randomize