found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
Randomize
