So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
Randomize
