Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
When he brought me into his room he showed me his James Bond calendar and matching sheets, and then told me that his goal in life is to be James Bond….epic fail. Mission Impossible. I was scared to take off his boxers to find out that they were also James Bond themed.
RUN LIKE YOUR JAMES BOND
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
Randomize
