Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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