he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
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