Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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