Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
I think a kid would responsible me up
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
Randomize
