I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
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