Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
Randomize
