1:32a: I quit. signing up for eharmony. Don't judge
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
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