We won't sleep together?
Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
