just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
