he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
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