Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
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