Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize