i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
Randomize
