1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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