pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
