So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
Randomize
