tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize
