oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
Randomize