p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
Randomize
