So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
Life lesson: Don't give a drunk girl a dutch oven after having taco bell. She puked all over my pillow. Funny as hell though.
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
Randomize
