Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
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