Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
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