Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
i am craving dick and cupcakes
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