Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
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