so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
I just noped my wife on Tinder. Turns out I was the second one to find out that we both have it.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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