that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize
