So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
I feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear.
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize
