I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
Four minutes until I can fart!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
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