there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
