I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
I had a dream last night that Anthony Bourdain gave me a vibrator.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Randomize
