normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
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