I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
My life is pants optional.
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize