found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Randomize
