We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
Randomize
