I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
Randomize
