I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
I want you more than these girls want KFC
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so my phone autocorrects 'retard' to 'retaaahd'. i LOVE being a masshole!
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
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