Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
